oOo…ADecadentExistence.com now features skimply clad women. I want this frame.

We have all been obsessed with something at some point in our lives. For a few of my male friends and myself lately it’s a female (shocking huh?). We men seem to compare women to inanimate material objects. The difference being we are able to fully comprehend why we are attracted to such objects, and how they function. Women…Oh what I’d give to fully understand the female psyche.

Four of us have been dealing with this issue in our own methods, trying to keep our minds off these vixens. One of us has picked up a old mercedes to restore and is focused on motorcycles and his dog. A second is busy with business ideas, networking and self-improvement. The third is an alcohol affectionado, photographer and insomniac as a result. Nothing has really changed in my life, my threshold for stress is fortunatly higher then most people. “C’est la vie” as many people put it. Anyways…we do have one common interest, we’re all picking up road bikes.

Can you imagine it? Team Torturé Par Des Femmes.

-Wallace

*update* Make that 5 male friends! This is hysterical. I just need to sell him on the road bike idea. LMAO.

Been doing nothing today but bullshitting out in the pool. It’s almost 6pm and it’s still over 100 degrees F. My carpet is hotter then my body temp. I have not been this uncomfortable since the summer I lived in NYC. Next purchase - Portable A/C unit.

…ok time to get drunk at the couture party. (who the hell calls their party a couture party?! but…then again we have a label called Aristokrat Couture…and it’s at 111 Minna. I can’t refuse!)

*Update* We never made dinner at Lime, but we all eventually made our way to 111 Minna just before 11pm. Had an awesome night with everyone, met quite a few new faces as well. Ended up hooking Sia up with a very cute girl, she opened up nicely after parting with her gate-keeping look-a-like cousin. Ended up back at Amy’s and filling up on pizza, mac cheese, and almost bagels with peanut butter. What a diaster, I passed out on the way back from the city and realized I was drunker then I thought. Spent the night in Palo Alto. Definitely have to do this more often.

It’s been awhile since I couldn’t sleep, last night was one of them. Tossed and turned all night, cold sweats and even almost fell off the bed at one point. It is partially due to the heat but mostly due to thoughts racing through my mind. There are just certain truths that I will never understand, time to just accept things and move along.

Meredith’s advice from years ago comes to mind, “No matter how bad of a situation you believe you’re in, there’s someone who is in a even worse situation.” When she told me this she was actually referring to herself, it was I that was too focused on myself to realize this. However today…I don’t know that other person and if that other person exists I’d hand him a pistol, one bullet, and tell him, “Make it count.” Afterall…life’s all about decisions, make them and move on. My absolute worst fear is not succeeding in my own eyes, and a big part of that is moving on without regrets. I don’t ever want to ask myself ‘what if’ again, I just don’t like the feeling. It’s worse then vast emptyness and abandonment, at least with those there’s nothing you can do. It’s when you could of done something, but you did nothing that causes regrets.

You know what…I’m going to get new year’s eve drunk tonight. Cheers to life.

There have been enough people who have half jokingly made the, “Dood, you should do Half-Dome.” comment to me that I’m actually going to do it. Three of us will finally attempt this in September. Half-Dome is probably the most famous piece of granite in Yosemite Valley and a Class 3 climb, it would most likely be a Class 4 if not for the pre-installed cables. The hike itself is 8.5 miles with a very strenuous elevation gain of 4,800 ft.

Here’s the crazy part, it honestly does not sound that difficult. People have been telling me to do this trek as it’s probably one of the last trails in California that I have yet to accomplish. It just does not appeal to me, Yosemite in the summer is hot, dry, and full of tourists. There is nothing to witness but rocks and the occasional bear that chases you across the lake. It sounds like absolute torture if you ask me, 8.5 miles under a scorching sun, ascending 4,800 feet on switchbacks then climbing a almost vertical slab of granite and all that for what? To say “Yes, I’ve done half-dome” (implying that I’m better then you) with a douchebag smile? Nah…if anything it’s to reply to douchebag’s that start with the, “Oh you haven’t done Half-Dome? Let me tell you about Half-Dome…” Instead of saying “No, I haven’t done Half-Dome” and having to listen to their holy of holy trails, I could finally reply with “Yep. Been there done that.” Douchebag would have nothing to say, and I trumped the situation. Fin.

Well… I’ll let you know how difficult it really is when September comes. We’re probably going on some kamikazi mission, at least it sounds like it.

Crazy? A little. Exciting? Yes. Doubts? Some. Suicidal? Sure feels like it.

-Wallace

I’ve been told a few times that the pictures are too small and I should turn them into thumbnails. I’m going to try a new approach as thumbnails are currently out of the question. Went to the city to have lunch with Jonathan and Alicia this afternoon. Here’s a photoblog of the events that transpired.

I caught traffic coming off 280 onto King St. This guy was energetic and had a smile. I gave him some money and told him I’d like to take his photo. Here he is, he said he’s originally from Fremont, anyone know him?

After the freak parking lot I finally arrived at the met and was joined with Jonathan and Alicia shortly. We walked over to the Chieftain which is just shy of a mile away. Here she is:

As we sat down you can’t help but admire the beer taps on display. I have a Guinness addiction, but I have something like a angel watching me these days so although very tempted, I ordered an Arnold Palmer instead. (For the curious: it’s a mix of ice tea and lemonaide, non-alcoholic.)

The waitress comes and I order my usual, Chieftain Cheeseburger with EVERYTHING. well..almost, I don’t get the second patty because I can’t eat that much. What does “EVERYTHING” translate to? Fried Egg, Smoked Bacon, Blue Cheese, Mushrooms and Carmelized Onions. It truely is decadent, and as Brandon said…the perfect hangover cure.

Jonathan and Alicia being devirginized to the Chieftain. They’ll have to get everything next time.

it’s halftime…you hungry yet? look at those awesome layers. each one with it’s own taste and texture. want some?

The Chieftain. A San Francisco Legend on Fifth and Howard. I know I need to work on the picture sizing, but how do you like the new picture format?

-Wallace

**update**
Brandon Wicks: you fucked me up wiht that Chieftan post on your blog
Brandon Wicks: im still staring at teh burger

You ever wonder where people get those stupid ‘tests’ from? The type that will tell your personality, the woman of your dreams, what car you should drive, or how successful you will be? I found the mother of those sites the other day, blogthings, would you believe a site dedicated to those annoying little tests? I thought these things only existed in cosmo. The only thing lamer? blogs. like this one.

As lame as they are…here’s a few that I did and my results. Let me know what you get.

What 2007 Car Should You Drive?
***Ford Shelby Mustang Cobra*** - yuck.

What’s Your Personality Type?
***The Executive*** - I’m quite flattered, I wonder what I have to choose to get ’slacker’

How Normal Are You?
***You Are 55% Normal*** - I can live with that.

Are You A Gentleman?
***You Are 24% Gentleman*** - I don’t think I ever said I was. Damn.

What’s Your Love Style?
***Your Love Style is Agape*** - it tells me I’m the most rare. what’s that supposed to mean?

What Kind of Flirt Are You?
***You Are a Natural Flirt*** - oOo

How Boyish or Girlish Are You?
***You Are 70% Boyish and 30% Girlish*** - I got 60/40 the first time I took this…not sure if I should of told you that.

Penis Name Generator
***Your Penis Name Is El Presidente*** - talk about presidential treatment. so you girls want to meet the president?

Boobie Name Generator
***Your Boobies’ Names Are Silk and Satin*** - hmmm…you think it’s talking about mine? I got boobies? whoa.

How Abnormal Are You?
***You Are 24% Abnormal*** - So I’m 55% normal and 24% abnormal…where’s the remaining 21% of me? Either I’m not a full person (yes I see you smiling) or this is bullshit. I’m going with the latter.

more here.

-Wallace

Last night we went to grab a couple beers at a local bar. I was talking to Patrick about his mindset along with Theresa’s during the Nike Woman’s Marathon they completed last year, then our conversation somehow drifted to the topic of good samaritanism. Larry brought up how he once made a connection to a old chinese woman at an convalescent home, then how he used to hang out with bums at Cal. You know…buy them pizza and have a chat, it might sound crazy but they really appreaciate the time and effort. He has at the very least acknowledged their existence, when society seems to prefer to sweep them under the rug. out of sight, out of mind. sad really. Anyways…

I can’t remember if it was Thanksgiving or Christmas 2004, I ended up having a light dinner with my family in the east bay then crossed the bay to Palo Alto where I met up with a friend. We ended up going to the 7-11 off Lytton Ave and loaded a shopping cart with cheap beer. You know…stretching our bucks as far as they’ll stretch. Natty Lights, MGD, Coors, you name it. It didn’t cost us much maybe a couple hundred at the most (cigarettes and beef jerky was also in that cart). There’s not a huge homeless population in Palo Alto to begin with especially during the winter months so that cart went a long way. We pushed the cart a few blocks to the small park where many of them sleep for the night and just started passing out cans of beers. Soon we had a good gathering they were drinking, we were drinking, they were laughing, we were laughing.

Their expressions, smiles, and eyes told a story that I could never forget. The joy and insanity of it all was just preposterous. We often joke about repeating the event…who knows, we just might.

Afterwards my friend went home and I rushed over to Melinda’s house for dessert and wine. Sorry Boebs…this is why I showed up buzzed that night. I still remember one of her aunt’s who was agape with the blender that she produced a never ending factory of copious blended cocktails. I believe the strawberry shortcake drink was the most delicious…still not quite sure how she convinced me to drink that. mmmMmmm….

-Wallace

So to offset the fumes that my orange monster expels I have decided to pick up road cycling. Can you imagine me in tight compression shorts? I mean are those things even legal in public? I wonder how many people I can make uncomfortable. I’ll probably just bike to Peet’s and constantly scratch my balls, not to mention shoving them in anyone’s face as soon as the oppertunity presents itself. Oh wow…if I follow this thought process, I’m surely to get arrested. Looks like I’ll just have to behave.

Anyways…waiting for a friend to get back to me with pricing. I think I have narrowed it down to the Fuji Roubaix or the Lemond ETape then upgrading the components to Shimano 105’s or ultegras unless I can get a Dura-Ace or Campy Record group on a dime.

On a seperate note, I realized I’m still addicted to carbon fiber, and this is looking to be my next money pit.

-Wallace

A True Testiment to my leadership (or lackthereof).

Larry

Well, it’s 8:15am and I’m wide awake. This camping trip has thrown off my sleeping schedule…or made it right again, depending on how you look at it. I’m sore as hell, and I’m covered with 18 bug bites, but it was so worth it. It was a great time with some great people. Despite getting lost under the lead of captain Wallass, the trip was a huge success in my eyes. Thanks to Thu and Mike for lending me your sleeping pad since my yoga mat sucks. And thanks to Stephano and Janelle for lending me your bug hut - I actually got some sleep that last night. Your guys’ extra gear was heavy as hell! Special thanks to Wallace for putting it all together. This wouldn’t have happened without your planning (or lackthereof) - it made for an interesting adventure. And thanks for letting me eat all your food.

Some quotes that particularly stick in my mind from the trip…

-”Do these guys look familiar?” - The thought running through everyone’s head after passing those two old guys on our loop around the trail the first day

-”These guys are idiots.” The thought running through the heads of the two old guys as we pass them again on the trail

-”We’re not going to get there for another 3 hours or so” - Wallass, 15 minutes before reaching Waterman Gap Camp.

-”OW…a mosquito bit me in the ass!” - Thu ……”Girl, that’s good for you. You need the help!” - Jenny

-”duuuuuuuude, i don’t know any other sexual positions!” - Sunny………………”Missionary and doggystyle are the only two you know?!?!? I feel so sorry for Lauren!” - Larry

-”America’s not a country! Oh……shit. DAMMIT!” - Thu

-”hahahaha…*SNORT*…hahhahaha” - Jenny, high as a kite

-”mmmm, i looooooooooooove sausage” - Sunny, as he stares at Wallace…err…i mean as he puts another sausage in his mouth….err…hell, i don’t know how to make this sound non-homo

-”PBBBBBBBBBBBBBBT” - Q (That’s a fart btw)

-”PBBBBT” - Larry (A smaller fart, Q had me beat all weekend)

-”Parking in the rear.” - Sunny (apparently sunny reads all the signs we drive by, but only the homoerotic ones get read outloud)

Anyone care to add any?

Have a good 4th of July guys. thanks for the good times!

-lmh

Tu

Yes, it was a lot of fun! I wish we could have stayed for the entire trip.
Thanks for putting the trip together Wallace.

Lawrence, I have one for you:

Tu: “Did anyone say SCHLOOONG?!!”

Jenny

Once again another bomb-ass trip made possible by Wall-ACE! You’re not a an
ass afterall Wally… maybe if we listened to you on our last day we might
actually be hiking ON Sky-line. But who’ve listened to you after the first
day! But any rate… we still enjoyed breath taking views towards Waddell
Beach eventhough we were on the trail marked for HORSES!!!! Actually to
think of it I would’t take any other route and with anyone else but it
would’ve been great if Jenel, Stefano, Mike and Tu could’ve joined us. Quang
and I had an awesome time and down to do the Point Reyes for Hog Island
Oysters like we mentioned on our last day.

Here you go, Larry…

Sunny: Types of juice… Larry: Pussy Juice!
Jenny: Types of Tampons…. Tu: OB… Jenny and Larry @ the same Time: Darn!
My all time favorite…. sign that says… “Skyline to the Sea: Horse Trail”
after we hiked the entire trail.

Jenny

Quang

Yes Sir, I will have to admit it was a great trip. I was kind of hesitant
about going on this wild outdoor adventure. Who in their right mind would
want to hike 30 mile for fun? But I’m really glad I went. Big up to
Wallace for setting this up. Hopefully we can have another crazy adventure
in the near feature. Maybe next time Larry will bring hiking shoe…hahaha.
Also I want to say thank you to Tu for cooking up some bomb ass smores it
was delicious =). Lastly a special thanks to Stephano and Janelle for
picking us up.

Erwin

I had a great time too!

Oddly, I the best part I enjoyed was hearing people
say what’s good to eat in the bay area!

That horse trail was the best. Maybe it was because
it was the only day my feet didn’t hurt like crazy or
was it because I offloaded like 10lbs. Not taking a
stainless steel pot again!

Thanks for setting this up Wally.

I’ll send Wallace my pictures, I think he has a better
way of distributing than I do. For now enjoy the
banana.

erwin

32-33 miles in 3 days and 2 nights. I’m proud of you all, that’s definitely not a stroll in the park. Although we did have our fair share of problems, you all did great. I thought we had great cadence, and motivation. I don’t recall anyone bitching the entire trip, now that is something to take pride in. I’d backpack/camp with any of you anytime. Good Times and Great Memories…I’m covered with bug bites as well, and scratching like a fleabagged dog right now.

Thanks guys, you all have made this trip a huge success.

-Wallace